Thieves have stormed an Apple store and stolen Apple phones

A CLUSTER OF SEVEN CRIMINALS, a sort of dirty half dozen with a plus one, have swaggered into an Apple store, scared some people and stolen enough iPhones for them each to have two and give five away.

According to Fox News, the thieves stormed the store in Natick, Massachusetts, and carried out a well organised but pretty crappy raid. It seems that the group, a mix of lads and lasses, stormed in and swarmed a display.

Once in swarm mode, the group produced some sort of cutting equipment, perhaps strong scissors, cut the security cords that bound 19 handsets, then ran out of the store cradling handfuls of iPhones. 

Fox says that the whole thing took about two minutes, or about the time it takes Siri in the UK to work out what you are saying.

Fox links to the Boston Globe, which is a relief since we take everything that Fox says with a pinch of grubby salt, and that report says that something else happened recently that was quite similar.

It reports that a dozen teens recently mooched their way into another Apple store and took over 20 handsets. They have released a video of the latter attack, and they do show that the group is organised.

This suggests that they are not teenagers, because in our experience teenagers sit around flicking their fringes out of their eyes talking loudly or milling around outside stationery shops and train stations laughing too loud and conspicuously smoking cigarettes while drawing on their rucksacks.

However, the people in the video are wearing hoods, so perhaps they are just very motivated teenagers who are whooped up on Bieber, YOLO snacks and high energy fizzy pop drinks.

According to the Boston Globe, the Natick Police confirmed the latest attack and described it thus: "In orchestrated fashion these individuals cut the security cords and exited the store with 19 phones. The group fled easterly on foot and despite an extensive search was not located."

Our advice is to check public parks, particularly ones with skate ramps in them, bus stops, around the back of the library and outside any local newsagents that might sell cigarettes without finding it necessary to ask for any form of identification. See also off licenses and the curbs outside fast food shops.

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